We took a long, winding bus ride to Luang Prabang yesterday. 9.5 hours. Only 357 km but through beautiful mountains so the going was slow.

I started feeling "something" seriously attacking my immune system last evening so I supported my body with everything I have from my pharmacy of natural healing remedies, including lots of water with Vitamin C. We've taken it easy today and I'm feeling much better. It's 5 pm Tuesday.

The reputed best place to eat in LP is at the night market, which hosts a huge assortment of Laos food. As you can image, we didn't recognize much of it, but with a few questions, we had a great meal. The night market is like a giant outdoor Lao buffet. Such a delicious dinner we had.

This morning I was up at 6 am to watch the monks walk through town to gather alms, their daily food from the local people.

We're staying in a beautiful, comfortable guest house with warm, English speaking Laos. It's a family business. Will write more tomorrow afternoon with more stories of the day.

So much to share and time to get some sleep. It's now 9:30 pm here in Luang Prabang on Wednesday evening. We just finished eating a Lao-style BBQ with lots of veggies and chicken and a coconut shake for me. Beerlao for Doug.

Today we visited Kuang Si waterfall about 25 minutes away. Amazing! The whole mountainside was alive with rushing water, splashing down over layer after layer of limestone. Some were very low falls. Others higher. When we got to what may have been the end, we looked up and there was a huge series of falls above us, the closest one at least 120 feet, maybe more. The entire experience was breath-taking and beautiful,

plus there is an Asian Bear rescue center there so we got to see several. They are also called moon bears and are the ones with a white crescent on their chest.

I've been enjoying the fresh fruit shakes here. My faves so far are the lime and the coconut ones.

Today we also visited Big Brother Mouse, a non-profit where they make Lao books for children to promote literacy. The artwork is child-friendly and the message of the stories insightful. We bought some to take to the villages where we are going during the next few days.

Tomorrow we travel by mini-van and slow boat to Muang Ngoi Neua, a small, rural town north of here about 4 hours. There's lots of hiking, visiting ethnic tribal villages and caving in the limestone karsts. And internet access that is probably there in case of emergency. This means no internet for the next four days. What a novel concept! I'll write when we return.

We arrived Friday evening in Vientiane after flying 13 + hours Wednesday night to Hong Kong, on which we slept pretty well. Like Cathay Pacific as an Asian airline.  Friday, we had an 8-hour layover in Bangkok so we took a bus downtown and just walked around exploring and had a VERY SPICY chicken curry at a street vendor. People are so friendly for a mega-cosmopolitan city.

Flew Lao Aviation to Vientiane–a two propeller with 30 seats.

Flew fine and was fun to hear the sound of propellers. Arrived about 8pm, got our visas, our guesthouse met us at the airport, we quickly took showers, and passed out. Exhausted. Slept about 10 hours.

The Lani Guesthouse is a lovely colonial mansion with a beautiful garden. They served breakfast with delicious Laos coffee each morning on the veranda.

Have had a fun day yesterday getting to know our way around Vientiane. Happened on to a funeral where we watched the entire ceremony, including the pyre to cremate the body. Wow!

Then in the late afternoon, we went down to the Mekong River to watch the sunset. Doug had his iced Beerlao and me a fresh pineapple shake. Delicious and relaxing!

Dinner last night was fun as we ate at a restaurant frequented by US expats and had three of them sit down next to us. We loved hearing their stories about their time in Laos during the 60's when the US was heavily bombing Laos in its war against the North Vietnamese. These men were involved in civilian community service projects and were helping the Laos village people to build wells, roads, medical dispensaries of basic needs. They strongly felt their story during this time period had not be told by the media. Fascinating men and great conversation!

Today we continue our exploration of Vientiane, including a few wats

 and getting a Laos massage for $7 for an hour. What an opportunity! We're going to Luang Prabang tomorrow–Monday–morning.

Will again from there.

Happy Trails!

To your Joy with Children,
Connie

When you define your role as a parent or educator, most would say, “Guide, teacher, caregiver, disciplinarian, soother, arbitrator, helper.” “Explorer” is probably not a word you would include in your list. What I’ve found is to be an extraordinary parent who empowers your child to express her full potential you must be an explorer.

When I coach parents individually or in my classes, a question that frequently comes up is, “How do I get my child to ___?” You can fill in the blank with get ready for bed, get out the door in the morning, do his homework, listen to what I say, put her things away, brush his teeth. This puts you in the role of trying to manage your child’s behavior and the one who maintains the status quo. In fact, most parents believe their job is the developer and the enforcer of the status quo for their child.

When I say ‘status quo”, I mean the current situation, present state of affairs, the usual way things are without change. Parents and teachers often see their role as the one who defines and decides the usual way things are to be done in their family and by their child, and these seldom change.

Developing, maintaining, and enforcing the status quo for their child becomes a parent’s primary challenge as they struggle with how to do this effectively and efficiently while still being loving and trying to bring out the best in their child. This is a big job and a lot of work and effort.

Parents and teachers unconsciously become more rigid, confused, and arbitrary over time and stop listening to their child from their heart. The status quo becomes more important than their child’s emotional wholeness and having fun as a parent.

When you perceive your role as explorer, however, your effectiveness, ease, fun and fulfillment increase dramatically. Two definitions of ‘explorer’ I found online are 1) a person who investigates unknown regions; 2) one who searches or travels a terrain for the purpose of discovery. These meanings imply actively looking with openness, desire, a focused intention, passion, curiosity, interest and fascination with something important and valuable. Now it starts to sound more like parenting and teaching.

Being an explorer is the essence of being an extraordinary parent or teacher. Parents frequently complain and wish their child came with the manual. Many of you have heard me say, “Children do come with a manual. You just need to be able to read it.” You must be an explorer to discover how to read your child’s manual.

When you are an explorer, you are curious and open to discover something new about your child, yourself, your communication and your relationship with one another. You are fascinated and interested in the choices your child makes and in the feelings between you. You seek to discover new understandings in order to experience the joy of a loving, fun relationship with your child.

As an explorer, you are open every moment to its delightful experience, even with its complexity and lack of clarity. You are passionate about being a parent, and you desire to experience being the parent that deeply nurtures your child’s potential both now and for the future.

Being an explorer means being with the unknown, allowing it to show you new insights and understandings. It means staying open to the next amazing experience along your path. It means traveling the road of being a parent or teacher for the purpose of discovery.

I’ve found that to parent (or teach) with joy, you must be willing to live on the joyous edge, the place where moment-to-moment you don’t know what’s going to happen next. You are open to experience both the thrilling and the frightening experience of feeling slightly out of control and not knowing exactly what the future brings.

If you’re willing to tell the truth to yourself, you’ll probably find that you feel slightly out of control much of the time as a parent. Instead of resisting this, embrace being an explorer and enjoy living on the joyous edge of relating with the wonderful child in your life.