Doug and I had a magical, playful time riding and
horse camping in the redwoods. We did some exciting loping aka galloping on the
trails. Destiny and Echo are excellent at navigating narrow, winding  trails and
taking sharp turns smoothly and easily. All four of us had so much fun!

Here are a couple of photos of Destiny and me on the
trail. I couldn’t decide between the two so I decided to include them both.
When I see these, I am reminded of the beauty of life and nature and the
profound joy of living life to its fullest.

Lots of fun, exciting things happening here at Joyous
Parenting™ headquarters! I’m in the process of creating my first home study
program “How to Get Started with Joyous Parenting™”, which will be available in
a couple of months.

This simple program will get you started to have the
joy, ease, and connection you most desire with your child, and you’ll learn
effective, practical skills and insights that empower your child to be more
self-confident and cooperative. Watch for my announcement in a few weeks.

Plus I am expanding my focus to include all family
relationships, including your relationship with your partner and all family
members who are important to you. My new focus is Joyous  Families. So if you’d like to improve
your relationship and communication with a family member you love, email me to
time about your situation and what you’d like. I’ll share more about this soon.

In addition, I will be offering a new private
coaching program for busy parents who want deep, lasting family transformation
in the most time-efficient way possible. I’ll be announcing this soon.

Plus my next Joyous
Parenting Training begins in October. Here’s what one parent in my current
class says after only a few weeks,  Thanks for a great class.  I am
enjoying the process and the chance to hear other parents’ perspectives. Very
enlightening. Interesting how much I can relate to things people say. I
understand exactly what they are feeling. I really feel like this process is
helping me to grow as a person.

This all feels good… so much
better than going it without the "manual". I am benefiting so
greatly.

So if you’ve been thinking
about taking the Joyous Parenting Training, I recommend you make this the  time. Begin now to learn how to read the manual your child came with and have
parenting be so much easier and more fun. I’m putting together some cool
bonuses for this training. Watch for my announcement soon.

Have you ever asked yourself
‘how to’ solve a challenging situation or concern with your child? This is the
question parents ask me when they feel uncertain how to handle a difficult,
on-going problem with their child.

Asking “how to” is not the
best question for getting new insights and lasting results. I’ve found there
are other more important and helpful questions to ask yourself when times get
tough with your child.

Have you ever asked yourself ‘how to’ solve a challenging situation or concern with your child? This is the question parents ask me when they feel uncertain how to handle a difficult, on-going problem with their child.

You know the experience. Your older child is hitting his younger sister for the hundredth time after you’ve told him a zillion times not to do it. You’re late one more time getting out the door in the morning,making your child late for school and you rushing to get to work on time. Your child defies you one more time and you’re beginning to see red.

The really frustrating part is you’ve tried everything you can think of. You’ve explained, given a time out, created a chart on the refrigerator, yelled, taken away her toys, and cancelled a play date. Nothing makes a difference that lasts.

If you’re like many parents, you may be out of techniques to get your child to cooperative and behave. Sound familiar?

Parents often ask the “How to?” question, believing that there is a technique or right way to solve their problem. Yet parenting is not a science where you do Action A and your child reacts by doing Action B. It simply does not work this way.

Obviously you know this. Your child has taught you this. Yet most parents still think about their parenting challenges as if they are doing a science experiment or driving a car.

Being a parent and bringing out the best in your child is an art. It is a human art based on understanding what’s happening with you and your child emotionally. When you make powerful, effective choices that create an emotionally healthy relationship with your child, your child will naturally and easily make better choices and cooperate with you more. You’ll have more freedom and personal time.

So what can you do to be more effective at the art of parenting? Here are 3 questions you can ask to help you create a more healthy emotional relationship with your child?

1. What am I experiencing emotionally in this situation?

When the going gets tough, most parents don’t usually think about this question. Yet your emotions make a big difference when it comes to actually resolving your on-going parenting difficulties. I’m sure if you think about this just a moment, you’ll see the logic and practicality of it.

2. What is my child experiencing emotionally in this situation?

Your child’s behavior and choices are based on how he is feeling emotionally in the moment .Plus they’re also based on all the emotional decisions he has made about himself and life based on his previous life experiences.

When you understand your child’s emotional experience, you are more compassionate and insightful in knowing what to do next. Without it, you are like a ship lost at sea with no sense of direction about where to go next.

3. What do I want to be the emotional and practical results of this interaction?

Knowing the answer to this question will keep you focused on where you want to go. It will guide you to make a clearer choice that considers both you and your child. You’ll be less reactive and impatient.

Focus on the emotional factors to solve your parenting challenges.

If this sounds complicated, it’s actually simple when you understand the emotional dynamics of your relationship with your child. Begin by asking yourself these 3 questions, and you will find yourself being more skilled in the art of parenting. Then you’ll experience even more of the joy and ease of loving your precious child that you so deeply desire.

Before Doug and I scoot out the door for a few days of camping in the redwoods with our horses Destiny and Echo, I want to give you another update on the responses to my survey..

First of all, I so appreciate everyone’s responses to my survey questions. They have been so helpful to me and will definitely guide me as I develop new coaching programs and products for you in the future. I’ll be responding to some of you personally via email. I LOVED hearing from you!

One of the themes I notice in your responses is feelings of fulfillment and ease as a parent tend to decrease as children enter the teen years. Even when your child is young, some of you are already worrying and wondering about the adolescent years.

One mom wrote, “I have a fear of the rebellious teenage years to come even though my 3 daughters are only 7, 5, and 2 at the moment. I hope I have the strength and patience to discipline consistently so they “stay the course…”

I think many parents of young children can relate to her fears and concerns. This is a concern parents frequently share with me when they see a limiting behavior in their young child and worry what her future will be if this behavior continues into adolescence and adulthood. These are very real and significant concerns.

Another mom who has already walked this road shared her experience, “Very mixed…..I have 2 daughters (22 and 28 yrs).  They are very different in their relationships with me.  The older one is extremely distant while the younger one is hot/cold.  When they were young (to middle school age) they were both extremely loving, affectionate, close and a pure joy. 

My biggest challenge is wondering where things went wrong with my older daughter that has kept her at such a distance for the past 10 yrs (since she went to college) and wondering if there is anything I can do but wait and hope she comes back.”

This is one of the most profound pains a mother or father can experience. Yet it is not a unique story. So many parents of teens with whom I speak share the confusion and angst of wondering what happened to the loving, affectionate younger child they once knew. Now they’re facing a child who has grown distant and who’s response is usually, “no.”

If you’d like to prevent or stop making unconscious mistakes that push your child away when they enter adolescence and adulthood, this is one of the topics I’ll be discussing on my special F.R.E.E. call next MONDAY, AUGUST 31.

I’d love to have you join me on this call to learn: “Beyond Techniques: The 5 Most Important Understandings that Will Immediately Bring More Joy to Your Child’s Eyes and Transform Your Relationship with Your Child”

These 5 valuable principles taken from my new book Joyous Child Joyous Parent will help you create a strong, more loving connection with your child whether you have a young, adorable child or a surly, defiant young adult.

Reserve your spot in this F-R-E-E call here:
http://joywithchildren.com/party.html

You're welcome to invite your friends and family to the call. The more people on the call the better it will be! Use the link above to share with your friends and colleagues:

I look forward to "seeing" you on the call!