Do You Have the Mindset for a Joyous Holiday?

The holidays are filled with numerous opportunities
for sweet moments to fill your heart with joy. Here are five quick reminders to
keep you focused in a positive direction.

Find the innocence in everyone’s eyes – your child’s, your partner’s,
your parents or in-laws, those people with whom you share a passing
interaction.

Share the amusement and laughter of an unexpected funny moment.

Seize the opportunity to spontaneously experience a new adventure with
those you love.

Appreciate the amazing abundance of your life.

Do something luxurious to celebrate yourself. (This does not have to cost
money.)

Look forward to the New Year with a profound commitment to yourself and your
family to make the most of every moment you share together.

Joy and Love,

Connie

Joyous Holidays to You!

My husband Doug and I are so enjoying the fun, loving
holiday gatherings with family and friends, and we hope you’re enjoying all of
your holiday festivities. Our 2-year-old grandson Sebastian is eager to open
packages “I open it!” and likes Santa. We all love the magic of sharing
Christmas with him this year.

I’m delighted to be expanding my work to support you
with all of your family relationship challenges, including with your child,
your partner and any other family member.

A family is an interwoven living network, in which
each family member affects the emotional well-being of everyone else. This
means each person has the ability to transform the whole living network.

You can now find my website at http://joyousfamily.com. It looks the same
right now and will be changing soon. I’ll let you know as I add new resources
for you.

Want to Start the New Year with Your Child on a
Solid Foundation?

Another New Year is almost here, and I invite you to
make your family’s loving trusting connection a priority. To help you with
this, I’ll be giving an all new teleclass with fr^ee how-to tips to create a
more joyous family in 2010. I’m so looking forward to sharing this information
with you to help you start the New Year with your family on a joyous
foundation.

Do You Have the Mindset for a Joyous Holiday?

Want some last-minute ideas to help you keep a
positive focus during your family holiday celebrations, even when a difficult
moment occurs? Read today’s quick Joyous Family Tip for important ideas to see
you through this hectic time of year.

Xmas_09

Everyone in our family – Orion, Nichola,
Sebastian, Doug and I – wish you and  those you love deeply the most Joyous of
Holidays!

What Happened to Their Humanity? Part 1

This is a question on everyone’s minds in Richmond, CA, where a group of approximately12 teens watched while several young men gang raped and beat a 15-year-old girl. This is truly a horrific story, shocking and disturbing to everyone that young men would violently injure and abuse this young girl.

The haunting question on everyone’s mind is, “What about the young people who stood around and watched? Why didn’t they do something to stop it? What happened to their humanity and their ability to take action to call authorities?”

When we hear stories like this, we believe once again that the next generation lacks basic human values. We feel judgmental of them and question their goodness.

But young people do not make these choices in a vacuum. Young people choose these actions based on many factors. It is not that they are inherently bad people. It is not that they didn’t know better.

We need to look to the emotional environments in which they have grown up.

If we want young people to act with humanity, we must treat them with humanity. We cannot yell at them, perceive them as failures, ignore their requests and ideas without damaging their natural moral values.

We must walk our talk as adults with children and everyone with whom we interact.

Children will never learn true humanity by being taught by a teacher or from a textbook.

True humanity comes from listening to the truth within their heart. We can help children use this natural ability by listening to the truth within their heart, no matter how insignificant or inappropriate it seems to us.

And by not unknowingly diminishing their humanity as people.

When we as educators, parents and society honor the goodness in children’s hearts, children will honor the goodness in their own hearts and in the hearts of others.

Grandparenting in Mendocino ’09

Doug and I loved taking our 2-year-old grandson on our trip to Mendocino, a lovely, intimate town on the Northern California coast. As always, we stayed at the comfortable Inn at Schoolhouse Creek, a few miles south of town.

We enjoyed our hike up Jughandle Creek Trail to the Pigmy Forest at the summit. We all loved seeing the crazy abundance of mushrooms springing up everywhere. The most we've ever seen.

Sebastian practiced saying, "Mushrooms." Mostly it sounded like "Rooms." And he got really good at recognizing them.

The donkeys are at the Inn.

I hope you enjoy our photos!

PB230007 

PB230010

PB230016

PB230017

PB230020

PB230021

PB230023

PB230025

PB240027

PB240028

PB240032

This is Doug and Sebastian with Maureen, owner of The Inn at Schoolhouse Creek w/ husband Stephen, and their two children, Kayla and Max.

Are You Putting Everyone Else’s Needs Before Your Own?

The message this time of year is “Joy!” and “Make
Merry!” But is this really what you’re feeling as you haul yourself out of bed
in the morning, get your children to school, rush through your day and arrive
home to make sure homework is done and your children are in bed on time? And
squeeze in shopping and parties?

Probably not. Joy is often postponed until a later
date when you have the time or for a special event. 

If you’re like many moms – and dads, too – you expend
much of your energy and time taking care of your child’s and partner’s needs
and wants, relegating your own to the back burner for a later date. You may
feel you don’t deserve or can’t afford some private, nurturing time for
yourself when yesterday’s dishes are still in the sink.

You may feel you shouldn’t read the mystery you love
or take a nice hot soak when your child can’t seem to find anything to do and
he needs you to entertain him.

Or your husband has had a long day of work, and you
don’t want to burden him with taking care of your child when he wants to watch
TV.

Yet taking care of yourself is essential to you and
your family if you are to truly succeed in nurturing your family’s emotional
needs and empowering them to live their best life, joyously and successfully. I
cannot stress this too much.

In fact, I continually focus on taking excellent care
of myself and my own joy and fulfillment. The more I do it, the better I feel
and the more I enjoy my family and my life.

Of course, it’s important to respond to your family’s
emotional and physical needs. I’m not suggesting you neglect or ignore them. You’ll
find, however, the more you deeply nurture yourself, the more you’ll naturally want
to nurture your child and everyone else in your family.

Without some ‘Me Time’ and ‘Couple Time’, your effectiveness
and fulfillment as a mom and as a wife will be significantly diminished.

Here
are 5 important reasons why taking good care of yourself every day and
nurturing your own joy and fulfillment are ESSENTIAL for your family’s love,
joy, and Emotional Wholeness this holiday season and throughout the coming
year.

Reason #1  You feel happier, more content and fulfilled.

This means you come to your child and partner renewed,
refreshed, and ready to be more fully present. You literally bring your joy to
your interactions with your family. It only takes a moment of thought to
realize how important this is to their joy and contentment.

Reason #2  You have a clearer perception of potentially difficult situations
with your child and your partner.

You’ll listen more deeply and be more understanding
of his feelings in the situation. This helps you find win-win solutions and
prevent conflicts and emotional meltdowns. You’ll break away from the should’s
and do what is best for both of you.

Reason #3  You create an
emotionally and physically safe environment for all the people in your family.

When you’ve pushed yourself to your limit or beyond
your limit, your own emotional and energy reserves are depleted. At these
times, you have a short fuse and little things, like a forgotten kiss or a
little hesitation about getting ready for bed, can put you over the top and
into your own emotional meltdown.

When you feel impatient and at the end of your rope,
no one feels safe, not even you.

Reason #4  You model to your
child and your partner how to make choices that nurture one’s self.

You play a powerful role in
your family whether you realize it or not. One of the
most important things your child learns from you is how you treat yourself.
When you find yourself postponing or neglecting what you need and want for
yourself, ask yourself if this is the way you want your child to treat
her/himself.

Nothing I know of makes the importance of nurturing
your own joy more clear than to consider your child doing the same things they
see you do daily.


Reason #5  You live a fuller,
richer, deeper experience in life and in your family.

Imagine for a moment what a more joyous, fulfilling
life would be like for you. What would you do that you love? How would you feel
to simply delight in your family and in your life? How would it change the
choices you make if this were your reality on a consistent, on-going basis?

Make taking care of yourself a high priority this
holiday season and throughout the coming year!

Many moms won’t do this for themselves, and they will
do it for their child and their family. It doesn’t matter as much ‘why’ you
give yourself a more fulfilling life as it does that you do it. Everyone
benefits. You’ll see more delight and joy in your family’s eyes, and you’ll
create a more fulfilling, rewarding life for both yourself and everyone in your
family.

Try it! You’ll be amazed by the results.

I’d love to hear from you. Let me know what you
discover.